Maid in India - Boon or bane of working women

With the topic title like that - I am sure you are reminded of class VIII debates that one wud b forced to participate in. Well, this is not a debate and neither is it a post 'bout the notorious Shiney Ahuja case tht grabbed eyeballs. In fact, now that it is clear that the not-so-shiney Ahuja did indeed rape a minor, I must admit that I had not pegged him as an offender at all. Surprisingly, almost everyone who knew him said tht he was incapable of such an act, including his poor wife, Anupam. Or shd I say poorer maid? Anyway, thts not the subject of this post.

When my maid wanted 3 days leave to help out a distant relative around Christmas last year, if we had had any idea that we wud never see her again or how quickly our well-managed household wud fast become a mess - we wud have begged n pleaded with her to stay. Of course, since we did not know, we happily gave her leave to go. In the past 6 plus mnths - I have realized the important role a maid plays in the smooth functioning of my house and also how very difficult it is to get a good maid.

We have had maids who kept their own timings, demanded naashtha (breakfast), wanted Cha (tea) before they started work, or spoke too much. If they washed the dishes well, they did a bad job of sweeping and if they did a good job of sweeping they did a bad job of washing the dishes. It seemed so difficult to get a maid who did a good job of washing the dishes, sweeping and swabbing. Punctuality, cleanliness, gossip soon became the least of our concerns. They actually seemed trivial in comparison.

Some Gems:

• Stains? I cannot see any stain on this tea-cup. I have worked for marwadis. Do you know how clean they expect their cups to be? [This was in response to my pointing out a very visible tea-stain on the inside of a white cup.]
• Do I have to swab everyday? [This was a week after negotiating the salary based on the 3 things she has to do everyday: wash vessels, sweep the floor, and swab the floor.]
• I will work only wen you are there. [This comment had the Arien jumpin up n down. He said "Does she think I am another shiney?? Grrrr" A trip to KFC and a lot of "She did not mean tht... Its ok" helped him calm down n decide against kicking this maid out.]
• I am part of the ladies club and we meet at 4 pm every sunday. Can I just do the dishes for today? [Do I have to say anything?? ]
• Aunty, has uncle gone out??? [Whaaattt??? She was the mother of two toddlers and I was the aunty? Grrr..]
• When do you plan to have children? [Whoaa???]

Pfhwah!! Phew!!! Blaaaah!!! GRRRR!!! We had had enuf of it. We even did a pilot without having any one for close to a month. By end of month, we were praying for a maid. I was ready to accept all her conditions. I decided not to have any conditions of my own. As you can see, I was pretty desperate for a maid to help me out with some of the household chores. I brought this topic up at general get-togethers and this is what I found:

• No Maid?? Are you kidding me?? I have a toddler and in-laws staying with me. We have a cook, a maid, and a driver.
• Why wud I want to do all this menial work?? My brain will be pakaoed. I have a life.
• My maid cooks, cleans, sweeps, swabs, and washes clothes as well. I pay her well and she is almost like an extended family. She has breakfast and lunch at my home and packs some for her kids as well.
• Initially, when my MIL insisted that we don't need a maid for the two of us, I agreed. Our marriage almost crumbled under the pressure that I was going through. I don't care how the older generation managed... I cannot manage on my own. The maid brought a lot of peace in my home.
• I think a housewife does not need a maid. If you are working, it is better to opt for one. It also depends on the kind of work tht you do, and the support-system you have. Some one who has a stress-free life with fixed timings can take on additional tasks - if she so feels like it.

Interesting huh??!! So, what do you think??