5 Tips to Handle Your Lil One when they Throw a Minor Tantrum -- No candies involved

A tantrum is very much a part of the growing up process. Usually, it takes all your patience and your will-power to handle your lil one when they decide to throw a tantrum. The worst part is that it can happen anywhere- in public or at home, when you are with relatives or with strangers. Most tantrums are to get your attention or stem from being hungry, tired or hurt and frustrated. I am no super mother or child psychologist but I follow some of these tricks to help me handle Kuku's tantrums. I forget them at times and then have to go back and re-learn them :D

• Calm Yourself. This is important. If you are not calm, you react to his tantrum instead of acting on it. For instance, the moment we enter the house, Kuku wants us to take him outside on his cycle or his ride-along. We are both dying to have a cup of tea, coffee. Granddad wants to go to his home. Kuku has woken up from his sleep, is well-rested and ready for anything. He starts crying as his Granddad says Bye and then we have a full-on tantrum. Its very easy to yell at him at that moment (I have done that many times and am left with a lot of guilt) but the key is to spend some time with him. I walk into the play room and pick out his favorite puzzle and we play. In 15 minutes, he is telling me "goozob amma" which means "Good Job Amma"! Now, I can go make my tea while dad plays with him while drinking his coffee. In half an hour, Grandad is willing to take him downstairs to play.
  
• Monitor their Hunger and Fatigue Symptoms. Some tantrums are thrown because they are hungry or tired and want to sleep or from over stimulation after being around a lot of people. Even though Kuku loves his cousins a lot and has a lot of fun at their place, he either misses or delays his regular nap time and food when he is having so much fun. He usually falls asleep on the way back. But, he needs an hour of winding down or alone time by watching Masha and the Bear or Pingu on the IPAD before going to sleep at night. It is easier to finish visiting all the relatives at one go but it doesn't work for us that way. We have changed our plan.
  
• Distract them. At home, keep a few favorite toys that he no longer plays with in a separate bag that can be used to distract him. I keep Play Dough, Marbles, a Puzzle, a wooden whistle, a wooden top etc. If you are outside, keep your eyes peeled for distracting options - toy stores, ballons, etc. For instance, when we visit the mall, Kuku likes to go on the rides that they have on each floor. The moment the ride is over, he insists on going again or going on every ride at every floor on the way up and on the way down. As the Arien was beginning to lose it, I looked around and saw Hamley's. I asked him if he could see the Bear (a stuffed toy) and he joined us. Temper tantrum and all the tears disappeared in an instant. Because he is just 3, we do not even have to get anything at the store. He is happy looking at all the toys and riding on the ride-alongs, and spending sometime at the store etc. 

• Pick your Battles. For instance, can you delay bath-time by 10 minutes after he yelled "No" when you called him for a bath? If yes, delay it. If you do not delay it, the next 25 minutes will be nerve-wracking. Knowing your kid, factor in the delays so you are not late. When Kuku is watching Pingu episodes on the IPAD, he hates it when I ask him to switch it off and to come for his bath. I try to finish other tasks and then come back after 10 minutes. Most of the time, he is ready for his bath. If he is not ready, I try to push it for an additional 5 minutes but not more than that. He probably feels he has some control over his life when he gets to say when he will have his bath.
  
• Fake it. Pretend you are calm, and sing a song in your head as you attempt to fix the issue causing the tantrum. Sometimes, a smile or a joke can cause an escalation in their tantrum because they think you are laughing at them so do it carefully. Also, do not paste a very fake smile below your glaring eyes (that could burn anything in the path) and flared nostrils (trying to control the anger). Better to ask someone else to take over for a bit rather than to appear as a scary monster who will haunt them in their dreams :D  

If you think you are having the worst possible tantrum and you are going mad, read this article about other parents and the hilarious reasons why their kids threw a tantrum and you'll be fine: 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3819929/I-couldn-t-fix-cracker-Fed-parents-share-RIDICULOUS-reasons-toddlers-tantrums.html

Remember:

• Do not give in to the tantrum. You are implying that you will give them what they want only when they throw a tantrum.
• Do not bribe them with candies. Not good for their emotional health or their dental health.

Smile, this too shall pass :D